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Everybody wants to show up for their best friend as well as their best friend is able to be there for them. 

Or, we’re meeting new people and feeling like some of these new friendships could go to the next level and become really good friends. 

But when your best friend’s love language is words of affirmation and you feel like you can’t express yourself, it can be really discouraging! 

Nobody wants to feel like they’re letting down a loyal friend by not being able to give them the positive words and affirmations that they need. And you want to be able to express your friendship and love for that person in the way that is going to make them feel great! But if you’re not a natural with words, it can be tough. 

This post will give you examples of positive friendship affirmations and things to say to use your friends’ love languages. You can personalize them as much as you need to show your friends how much they mean to you!

What are words of affirmation?

‘Words of affirmation’ is one of the five love languages. 

All that means is, people have different ways that they prefer to feel loved. Some people don’t care about gifts, but will feel really cared about if you spend quality time with them. Others will really value physical touch in order to make them feel loved. 

Words of affirmation is the most common love language! It’s for people who feel most loved when someone expresses appreciation, admiration, or love through words. 

I’m sure you can call to mind a time when someone wrote you a note or email where they thanked you for something or expressed appreciation for something, or even just expressed sympathy in a tough time. Words of affirmation help us form a strong bond, because it shows that someone was paying attention, someone noticed our efforts, and someone cares about what we do and how we feel! 

Words of affirmation are a great love language (I’m biased!) because it’s not about money, it’s not about time–just about the meaningful connections between two people. 

What if I can’t write words of affirmation for my best friend?

The scary part about words of affirmation for a lot of people is that it feels like you have to be Shakespeare to get it right. If you feel less than confident as a writer, you might feel like you’re not a good friend. 

But banish those negative thoughts, keep a positive attitude, and know that you CAN write a words of affirmation note to your best friend. You can show them all the great things about them and become even closer friends. 

Let’s go through some steps to generate ideas, and then I’ll show you some samples. 

1. Start super simple. 

A words of affirmation best friend is not expecting incredible poetry! It’s more important that it come from you and what you know, think, and notice about them. 

So starting with something like, “You are my best friend” or “You are such a great friend” can help you get started with your note on a positive vibe. This can build your confidence. If you want to get fancy after this, you’re able to! But even this simple sentence is going to feel great for someone who values words of affirmation. 

2. Give a fact about your friend, then what it means to you/the friend groups. 

A big part of words of affirmation isn’t just hearing the words — it’s realizing that the people you love really do pay attention to you. In a world where a lot of people are lonely or feel ignored, realizing that the people around you love you enough to pay attention to the things you do is so affirming. 

So, you can think about something about the friend that you want to comment on, and then say something about what that means to you, or to your circle of friends. This might sound like, “Every day when I get to work, I see you making coffee and I know my day is going to be better” or “You are always there for me when things are tough with my family, and it means the world to me to know that I can rely on the love of my friends” or “Things haven’t been the same since you’ve been deployed and I just want you to know that I miss you so much!” 

All of these encouraging affirmations tell the person what they mean to you, but they also talk about the friend themselves rather than just talking about you the whole time. So the recipient feels noticed, appreciated, and understood. 

3. Say something about what kind of person or friend they are

I’m sure you have a lot of good things to say about your friend! This is the easy part–when we have good friends or supportive friends, it’s easy to make a bunch of positive statements about what they mean to you. 

Some brainstorming ideas to get you started: 

• what does your friend do for you? In what way does being around them support you?
• What do people always comment on about your friend or the friendship between you?
• Fill in the blank: “You are the kind of friend _________”
• Fill in the blank: “I will never forget the time ____________”
• Think about the length of the friendship. How has being friends with them made you a better person? 

This is a great opportunity to express gratitude to them for being the person that they are. You can think about all the good times (and hard times!) you’ve had together. 

And telling your words of affirmation best friend what it is about them that is so meaningful to you will help you show them that you notice them and pay attention to who they really are. That’s what a words of affirmation person needs to hear on a regular basis!

4. End with gratitude or positive thoughts.

Depending on why you’re writing this, you might or might not have an easy way to end. 

It could be, “I hope your 30th birthday is as full of all the fun moments and positive energy that you deserve!”

Or, it could be, “I know that grief takes a long time, and I will be here with you through the tough times for as along as it takes. Call me whenever you need to talk.”

Or, “I know that as a graduate and a nurse, you’re going to have a positive impact on so many amazing people. I am so proud of you!”

But sometimes we want to send a note like this just because! And there isn’t a really clear or obvious way to end. So you might consider trying something like one of these heartfelt affirmation options: 

• I love being friends with you, and I am grateful for the support and unconditional love you always have for me. 
• There are no friends like old friends, and I love you for being here with me every step of the way.
• Thank you for all the little things: late-night phone calls, movie dates, and pushing me out of my comfort zone. I love you!
• From shopping for prom dresses to planning your wedding, you have always been one of the most positive influences in my life and I am so lucky to have you. 
• Our friendship has been one of the best things to happen to me this year, and I am so glad you came into my life. 

Sample notes to words of affirmation best friends!

If you need to see a couple of examples, here they are! Feel free to use them, change them, personalize them, and add your own affirmations. 

Words of affirmation on a graduation

Dear (friend), 

Congratulations, graduate! I am so proud of all the work you put in, and I can’t wait to see you succeed as a (career). I know there were difficult times, but you are one of the strongest and smartest people I know, and I’m so proud to call you my friend.  As you move into the next stage of your life, know that I am always going to be here for you, cheering you on and eating all the popcorn. 

Our friendship means the world to me, and I am so proud to see you making a beautiful successful life for yourself. Positive people are the best people, and you are the best of all. 

Love,

(Friend)

Words of affirmation to best friend after a breakup

Dear (friend),

Just a reminder that you are my favorite human. Remember when we went to Florida and you told people you were a professional circus performer the whole week? I still laugh when I think about it. 

I know that things are so, so hard right now. But the right things happen for good people eventually, and I am always going to be here for you. You are so worthy of love and I love you. When you feel like you can, I want us to get together — we can just stay in if you want. But you are one of the most important people in my life, and I’m going to be here with you when it’s good and when it’s bad. I love spending time with you, even when you’re feeling sad. Whatever you need, whenever you need it. 

Love you, 

(Friend)

Words of affirmation to best friend just because

Dear (Friend), 

I love you!!! I’m sending you this note because you are the greatest and I love you so much. I want to tell you that I appreciate your heart of gold and the way that you always see the best in me even when I don’t. You just have the most beautiful soul and I wish I was more like you. Having you in my life makes it better, every day, and I am so grateful that you’re here. I don’t know how I got lucky enough to have the smartest, prettiest, kindest, funniest best friend in the world, but here you are! And every day I am thankful that you’re in my life. 

Let’s go get funnel cakes again soon. 

xoxoxoxoxoxo

(Friend)

Save this post to show her you love her whenever you need.